Cultivating a leadership philosophy to stay positive in difficult times.
Following a recent group conversation about New Year’s resolutions and our hopes for 2025, I spent 30 minutes driving home in silence because I was troubled. As one participant explained her rationale behind a pessimistic outlook on the state of the world, she concluded with a sincere wish that Elon Musk blow up in his rocket to Mars. I don’t know this person well, but I think her frustration manifests from good intentions–wanting humans to be more compassionate and helpful and less violent and destructive–but I do not see how Elon Musk exploding in his own space ship gets us there.
What gets us there, is when people, like Elon Musk, are compassionate and helpful rather than violent and destructive, when they use their significant power and influence to ease suffering in the world. Without question, this is a tall order, an impossible one if our expectation is that everyone on Earth will embrace one another in tears of joy. However, at the very least, we have a responsibility to try, and we have to be more creative than wishing death upon those who have strayed from the path of righteousness. I don’t believe that is how we heal the world’s suffering. I don’t believe that is the leadership philosophy we want to practice. Here are my initial thoughts in five quotes and some brief analysis.
It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. (Frederick Douglass)
This is true. If adults fail to teach children more mindful ways to live and lead, if we stoke ambitions for wealth, fame, and power–leaving the soft character stuff to chill like a side of asparagus in the shadow of a kids’ chicken tender basket–we are doomed.
I believe in kindness. Also in mischief. Also in singing, especially when singing is not necessarily prescribed. (Mary Oliver)
Above all else, we should value kindness and compassion–especially when it comes to the distribution of status, respect, and leadership. At the same time, mischief and play are OK. Joy is a good thing. We could all do with a little more good trouble in our lives, and we can stop pretending that we have never shared a mischievous laugh with friends.
As an individual, you may have some insight, and that insight gives rise to compassion and a willingness to act. But as an individual, you can only do so much. If other people do not have the same insight, you have to do your best to make your insight a collective one. Yet you cannot force your insight on others. You may force them to accept your idea, but then it is simply an idea, not a real insight. Insight is not an idea. The way to share your insight is to help create the conditions so that others can realize the same insight–through their own experience, not just believing what you say. This takes skillfulness and patience. (Thich Nhat Hanh)
Forcing a square peg into a round hole is indicative of immaturity and non-critical thinking. Such coercion only causes damage and distress. We need to be more skillful and patient for someone to adopt a new insight, surrendering a belief that was, up until the turning point, the truth. Here lies much frustration. How can I be patient? If I do not act forcefully, someone else will, and I will lose. Social media or some blustering bully will seize the opportunity if I am too slow and too meek. Fair points. We need to be more skillful.
At the time of the Buddha, there were countless religious and spiritual teachers, each advocating a different spiritual path and practice, and each claiming their teachings were the best and the most correct. One day a group of young people came to ask the Buddha, "Of all these teachers, whom should we believe?"
"Don’t believe anything, not even what I tell you!" replied the Buddha. "Even if it’s an ancient teaching, even if it’s taught by a highly revered teacher. You should use your intelligence and critical mind to carefully examine everything you see or hear. And then put the teaching into practice to see if it helps liberate you from your suffering and your difficulties. If it does, you can believe in it.” (Thich Nhat Hanh)
Forgive me for doubling up on Thich Nhat Hanh, but this one is really the Buddha, and I love it. Imagine a political candidate saying, “Don’t believe anything, not even what I tell you!” This is the kind of leadership we need, and the kind of education our children deserve if they are going to build a healthier society. Humans can take better care of each other and the planet. We can do better, but that will require critical minds (not the blow-people-up-in/with-rockets critical, but the intelligent kind).
We owe it to young people to ask the hard question: What if the problem has more to do with us–and how we treat the next generation–than it has to do with who they are? (David Yeager)
Do we have the humility to ask this question? Do we think that our generation has solved the world’s problems? Do we think that we are the best that humanity has to offer? Do we believe that if we raise the youth the same way we were raised, under the same conditions, that there will be a better world? Adults who blame the next generation for their problems are falling into a familiar trap. If younger generations did not solve the problems of their elders, most of us would still live in a world where it was deemed moral and legal to force people into slavery, consider a woman property, and execute someone for being gay (sadly, there are still places in the world that have not gained the insights that these are harmful practices).
What are my resolutions then? Act out of compassion instead of anger. Exercise a critical mind. Become a more skillful teacher.
Happy New Year,
Nick
Comentarios